Special Siblings: Growing Up with Someone with a Disability, Revised Edition (McHugh)

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Table of Contents

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Mary McHugh's reasons for writing Special Siblings.

Related Titles:

Special Children, Challenged Parents: The Struggles and Rewards of Raising a Child with a Disability, Revised Edition

Sibshops: Workshops for Siblings of Children with Special Needs, Revised Edition

Special Siblings
Growing Up with Someone with a Disability, Revised Edition
By

Mary McHugh

"In her book of compelling insights into the sibling experience, Mary McHugh writes about the life-altering legacy of he relationship with her brother, Jack, who suffers from mental retardation. Augmented by the voices of other adult siblings and the expertise of professionals, McHugh combines her insights into a poignant mosaic of experiences that are unique to siblings of persons with chronic illness or disability." —Milton Seligman, Ph.D., University of Pittsburgh

"In her remarkably wise book, Mary McHugh masterfully blends her experiences and the experiences of others with insights from clinical research. Although McHugh doesn’t shy away from the troublesome aspects of sibling relationships, Special Siblings also describes the remarkable attributes seen in many brothers and sisters of people with special needs." —Don Meyer, director of the Sibling Support Project, Children’s Hospital, Seattle

In this absorbing and candid book, Mary McHugh reveals what she experienced as the sister of a man with cerebral palsy and mental retardation — and shares what others have learned about being and having a “special sibling.” Weaving a lifetime of memories and reflections with relevant research and interviews with more than 100 other siblings and experts, McHugh explores a spectrum of feelings — from anger and guilt to love and pride — and helps readers understand the issues siblings may encounter in

childhood — such as dealing with their own needs for attention and information, identifying with their parents’ grief, understanding their sibling’s disability, and coping with their own feelings
adolescence — such as participating in family discussions, fitting in with peers, searching for their own identity, and talking to a counselor or therapist
adulthood — such as building a support system, navigating adult relationships, deciding whether to have children, and planning for their sibling’s future care

Emotional and enlightening, this book is a must-read for teen and adult siblings — and all professionals who support people with disabilities and their families.

ORDERING INFO
ISBN 1-55766-607-5
Paperback
272 pages
5-1/2 x 8-1/4
2002 / $24.95
Stock# 6075

Professional development on this title is available through Brookes On Location!

Table of Contents

About the Author
Foreword
Stanley D. Klein, Ph.D.
Introduction
Acknowledgments

I. Childhood

Your Needs
- The Need to Identify with a Parent's Grief
- The Need for Attention
- The Need to Achieve
- The Need for Information
- Why Parents Have Difficulty Talking about Disabilities
Your Parents’ Marriage
- Your Family’s Problem-Solving Style
- Marriages in Trouble
- Fathers
Your Feelings and How to Cope with Them
- Anger
- Guilt
- Embarrassment
- Help for Siblings
How Did You Get That Way?
- Type and Severity of the Disability
  - Cystic Fibrosis
  - Cerebral Palsy
  - "Invisible" Disabilities
  - Hearing Impairment
  - Mental Retardation Requiring Limited Support
  - Autism Spectrum Disorder
  - Mental Illness
- When the Disability Occurs
- Birth Order and Gender
- When the Younger Sibling Surpasses the Older
- Size of the Family
- Conclusion

II. Adolescence

Adolescent Angst
- Embarrassment with New Friends
  - Mental Illness
- Fitting In
- Life Is Unfair
- Anger and Frustration
- Guilt
- Getting Help
- Love and Pride
Who Are You?
- Asking to Be Included in Family Discussions
- The Search for Identity
- Fear of Abandonment
- Peer Pressure

Part III. Adulthood

Someone to Talk To
- Dealing with Anger
- Talk to Someone
  - SibNet
  - Friends
Your Relationships
- Caretakers
- Escape Artists
- Influence of a Sibling's Disability on Potential Relationships
  - When Do You Bring up the Disability?
- Choosing Friends
- Relatives
Your Career
- Choosing Human Services Work
- When the Human Services Field is Not the Right Choice
Do You Want to Have Children?
- Prenatal Tests to Detect Disabilities
- Deciding Whether to Have Children?
Who Will Take Care of Your Sibling?
- Talk to Your Parents About the Future
- Find the Right Lawyer
- Determine Living Arrangements
- Decide Who Will Care for Your Sibling
- Persuade Parents to Let Go
It Feels Like Love
- Love and Pride

Bibliography
Resources
Permissions
Index